Dear Mr Ed

Folks has called me all sorts of things bytimes, espeshually now that I’m gettin’ on a bit and maybe a tad more set in my ways.

Theres some that calls me a curmudjin, a skeptick, a Doubtin’ Tom, a Luddist (what ever the heck that is), a flat-Earth looney, or jest a stubborn old goat.

Wurst of all, I even been called late fer dinner a cuppla times.

But I dont let the name-callin’ get to me, its the sticks and stones you gotta pay heed to.

Thing is I know what I know and I aint shy of sayin’ whats on my mind, and what ever some other body says about me fer thinkin’ it jest rolls off me like I was a ducks behind.

Y’see, when a new noshun comes along, I like to take a good look at the facts and annalize the matter from all sides afore I jump on board with any conclushuns.

Once I get it figgered out, I cant be swayed by idol chit chat or even some other fellers so called facts.

As my Momma useta say, Rodney once you get somethink into that thick head of yers, even a load of stumpin’ powder wont budge it.

So you can imajin how I took it when Eva told me she seen a story on the innerweb that some brite spark somewheres has come up with a car that can fly.

Dont you beleave it fer one bitty minnit. It jest aint true.

OKay, I admit it looked fer a while there like I mite of been wrong when I sayed the Iron Horse wud never take the place of the reel thing.

But histry proved me rite in the long run. Take the Youcon fer instants. I dont care where you look, dollars to door nobs yer gonna see a lot more horses than trains.

Its the exsackt same thing with the horseless carridge.

Sure the infernal combustin’ engine has the upper hand rite now, and the best grazin’ land is bein’ paved over fer super hiways and such. But that wont last, mark my words.

Theres all ready signs cars aint doin’ near as good as horses. Jest look at all the recalls of late.

The nackers yards aint filled with horses thats been called in on accounta there breaks dont work, or they wont acksellerate, or they bust out in flames fer no good reason.

If they cant make a car that will stay on the road, how do they figger on makin’ one that can fly?

Fact is they cant. Gravvity wont let ’em. Ben Franklin proved it when that apple fell on his head.

So Jewels Vern be dammed, mankind will never get anywheres near the moon.

Theres one good reason, and thats the laws of fizzicks. If somethink is heavyer than air it jest wont fly. Espeshually a horseless carridge.

Like my Daddy wud say, you aint gonna get that thing off the ground, Orville.

Yer pal,

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