Before I seem like more of a curmudgeon than I actually am, allow me to state right off the bat: I’m not against New Year’s resolutions. I just know they ain’t for me.

Not that you should necessarily follow my track, lying on the couch in a turkey-induced coma.

I just know that as we roll towards the end of the calendar, the dinner party season begins. Indeed, ’tis the season for weekends filling up with holiday cheer and various other celebratory sundries.

Like most folks making their way through these December times, my personal vice tally climbs pretty high as I indulge in the typical excesses of food and libation. I like to kick it up a notch for the holidays, what can I say?

So when we get to the time of reflection on the past year, its various happenings, the highs and lows, I usually opt out. Not that I don’t believe in them. Au contraire, reflection and change are driving forces of humanity.

I just know that while I’m lying on the living room floor shouting “‘Appy New Year!” it’s not the best time to start making major life decisions.

All right then, when is it ever going to be a good time?

Well, not when I’m surrounding myself with boundless holiday bonhomie, lemme tells ya.

Besides, I figure this is the time of year we should be ultimately ignoring our personal foibles, don’t you think? Going into your family’s holiday meals with a pre-determined sense of guilt isn’t good for your mental health. Or your ability to chow down.

But when that big hand starts to slide closer to midnight this December 31, if you’re going to make that universal annual pledge of bettering oneself, let me give you some advice.

When coming up with resolutions, don’t get caught up in grading their level of reasonableness. As in: whether you’ll actually be able to accomplish them or not. The real point of the resolution is to acknowledge there’s something you’d like to change about yourself.

I think there’s enough nobility in simply making that statement. “A journey begins with a first step” and all that. If you honestly want to make an effort to better yourself, then good for you! I’ll still have your back even if you decide to drop your resolutions entirely.

It’s our prerogative as irrational human beings to change our minds. And when else but during the holidays are we at our most irrational?

I hope in the long run I’ll at least have assuaged a good chunk of the inevitable guilt that will roll around come mid-January. Besides, there shouldn’t be a need to beat yourself up in the coldest and darkest time for the territory.

It’s a “New Year” resolution after all, so go ahead and procrastinate away, because you have until the next holiday season rolls around.

And by that time, you’ll have some way better ideas anyways.

As well you should, since according to the Mayan Calendar, next year’s round of resolutions just may very well be our last.

That’s when I’ll finally make my own – to develop super-powers.

Happy Holidays!